If you wished someone something more value-based than ‘a good day’ or ‘a great week’, what might happen?
“Have a great forgiving week!”
We are sincere in our parting wishes. We want our friend, colleague, and grocery clerk, to have some positivity ahead of them. We also know that there are words that would better resonate with our core values – words that would have a greater impact on us than a simple ‘nice, ‘good’, or ‘great’. We almost don’t even absorb these default words as we walk away.
So why not blend a value into a parting wish? Something like, “I hope you have a forgiving day.”
What might happen? Maybe you would feel more centered in your values, and feel more authentic in your communication?
Role-model for repeating a short message
I remember working as an analyst in a standard, downtown, high rise building. Our offices were lined up along a hallway. This meant that as you walked down the hallway, you could wave and greet someone every few feet as you passed by door after door.
One particular executive would visit our area weekly, and he would take his time walking down the hallway of offices. He would make light inquiries into whatever someone was working on, and give encouragement. As he moved on, he would say, “Have a quality day!” I could hear this sentiment multiple times as he progressed through his visit along the entire hallway.
I was working for a railway company, where safety was a serious, on-going topic. He explained when I first met him, that he believed that attention to quality in our work, directly contributes to everyone’s safety – in the office and on the rails. His repeated use of the word “quality” became part of his persona. He didn’t lecture. He didn’t send memos. He didn’t make posters. He used a value-based salutation to be clear about what guided his work, and what he hoped would guide those around him.
Shift from Calculations to Motivations
One day, I was signing a card for his birthday. I immediately knew to write, “Have a Quality Birthday!” That’s when I realized how powerful his messaging had become. I started to see how much it motivated me more than an emphasis on ‘do everything right’ and ‘make no mistakes’. My world until then, had seemed entirely about calculations and accurate reports. His short message started me thinking about values and motivations.
Exercise
Try this exercise:
- Pick a core value. If you haven’t explored your values, scan a list (like this one) for one that jumps out to you.
- For one week, every time you extend a parting wish, use your core value word.
- Ex. Have a discerning day; a grateful week; a hopeful evening; a curious morning!
- Opportunities would be at the end of a video call, at the close of an email, as you receive a food delivery, etc.
- You might notice a range of reactions, or none at all.
- Do try to notice how you feel as you offer the short message.
- Also try to notice your attitude and energy as the week progresses.
Extended Exercise
- Try a different core value. Does it change how you feel? Is it easier or harder to say or write the short message? Does it “hit closer to home”?
- Reflect on these additional patterns and discoveries about what really matters to you.
- Reflect on how you share what really matters to you, with those around you.
